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My parentssaw that and thought after consulting with others that seeing apsychiatrist might help. I couldn?t tell this grown up anything so in asense I wasted their money. Now I could tell those shrinks how I feel,but as a kid I couldn?t. I was still afraid.Part of my fear was that I was the only one who thought that way. In asense that is true. According to statistics in the Netherlands aboutone child in eleven thousand births is a male to female transsexual andone child in twelve thousand is a female to male transsexual.There are other things that bother me. I cannot now or ever give birth.When she was pregnant my now ex-wife told me about how the baby wasmoving in her. Her description of what she was feeling inside herincluded a smile on her face that told me of the joy she wasexperiencing. I was happy for her and happy for me who was becomingthat child?s father, but I needed to experience that miracle from herperspective. Unless a miracle happens I will never experience the joyof. ’ ‘Why not?’ ‘Because I have a tendency to say more than I should and I don’t want you mad at me.’ ‘I can handle anything you say. I’m a grown woman.’ Keith lets out a sigh not wanting to do this. ‘You really want to know what I think of you?’ ‘Yes!’ Jackie says very demandingly. Keith straightens up, turns to face her and gets ready to tell Jackie his observations. ‘First, you aren’t afraid to strike up a random conversation with a stranger. You like being social and making new friends.’ Jackie’s face looks disappointed from the obvious observations he is giving at that point. ‘You also aren’t here for a hook-up. Your jeans fit you comfortably and not too tight to show off your butt. Your t-shirt is also not tight so you don’t show off your figure and attract unwanted attention. By the lack of make-up on your face you are comfortable with your natural beauty.’ Jackie smiles that Keith says she is naturally beautiful. However Keith turns away from her and stops talking. ‘Why did you.
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